Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Who's Voice Are You Living For?

I was sitting in the chapel of Northwestern College with my mom beside me. We were attending the anual confrence called "A Day Set Apart For Women". I think it was something like my third or fourth year going...I was in the middle of my season of deliverance from the strongholds on my life...the chains that were wrapped around my neck spiritually. Literally choking Life out of me...

As the speaker talked about our conversation with God, and how to hear His voice, how He speaks to us, I was fervently taking notes, as is typical for me, when she said, "Some of you are listening to too many voices in your head and all you should be/ or need to be listening to is God."

Suddenly the revelation of this truth I had been unaware of came in like a flood...and I began to cry uncontrollably. It was as if the dam burst, and I was "let loose". I heard the Lord speaking to me in those moments, "Kathy, you have been living in the expectations of your husband and father (and other unknown voices came to mind)...what they might say underlies everything you do, or say fearing their disapproval. Honey, you CAN'T be perfect for anyone! You are making them your god by allowing this fear of their disapproval to have power over you!"

I left that day with less weight, with fewer links in the chains that had been holding me captive. As I returned home, I had to begin to walk free, to practice watching "who" was in my head "steering" my emotions, my decisions (or lack of) The healing was taking place. A promise that The Lord kept reminding me of was happening...

Psalm 18:19 He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me.

1 comment:

Edie said...

Oh Kathy I can so relate to this. I have just recently discovered how easily I allow this bondage to hold me in certain situations. Thankfully God rescues me from the situations but I so want to get to the point where I don't allow it.

Wonderful post! Good to hear from you too! I sent you an email.

Much love!